Culture My Faves TV — 07 August 2012
“True Blood” Recap: Everybody Wants to Save the World

Why don’t they just stake me already?

“True Blood” is just torturing me like Eric did LaFayette back in Season 2.

This Sunday was another mess…  Not the worst of this season, as that would be hard to achieve, but not very promising either.  I almost couldn’t bring myself to write this Truesday post.  But hey, the Kyles Files is no quitter.  So, let’s go…the good, bad and ugly of the hour that tied up the smoke monster plot, ended with Eric on the wrong side of the authority and featured a look at a young Alcide.  I’ll start with the good.

1.  Go North, Young Man

My strapping gorgeous Viking, Eric Northman, hasn’t had his customary amount of screen time, but he got to shine in this episode.  I enjoyed watching him stick it to Nora, literally, and I even went back and watched again because I find that actress/her character excessively annoying.  In addition to giving Nora what for, he really ought to smash that confused, goofy Bill Compton for setting him up for the ultimate FAIL at episode’s end by snitching on his getaway plan.  And Gawd knows what they’ll do to the traitorous techie/adorable actress, Tina Majorino.

2.  Damn, Pam

Speaking of Eric, who the hell is that Marilyn Manson-looking fool trying to take his sheriff job?  When this MTV2-looking creep threw my beloved Pam across Fangtasia, I was genuinely angered.  Here’s hoping Pam and Tara will team up on that ass, Thelma and Louise-style and give him what for, next ep.  And now….onto less pleasant matters.

3.  Medium Well

I continue to relish the return of spunky LaFayette, but even he acknowledged he is doing a poor man’s Whoopi Goldberg act in this episode, which I pointed out last week.  His chats with the “dead bitches” was funny, but it also reminded me of another plot point I’d sooner see in the ground.

4.  Tarlene

Yes, this is one of those celebrity nickname thingies I’ve assigned to my two least favorite Bon Temps denizens.  The resolution of the smoke monster plot was horrible, but on the bright side, consistent with the cheap special-effect laden storyline.  Now, if I were the ghost of a woman shot in the head by high, morally bankrupt soldiers, I would tell them they had to commit murder/suicide or I’d singe the pants off everyone in their generation for centuries.  Instead, the shooter is allowed to kill his sergeant and the gray talcum powder beastie just fades away into the wood paneling at Merlottes.  Nah, we don’t believe you.  You need more people.

5. Win, Lose or Drew

Nancy Drew novels are writhing in their graves at the ham-handed way we discovered the former sheriff, Bud, was the leader of the Obamas.  Cowboy boots in a picture?  A flashback to him receiving said boots at a retirement party?  Really?  Egads…  And points taken from both the current sheriff and Jason Stackhouse for acting like Keystone cops during their investigation.  All they needed to turn this hawt mess into a “Scooby Doo” scene was have the villain remove his mask and be dealt with in some grave manner.  Well, that actually happened, but there was no oversized pooch, snacks or scraggly bearded hippy with a bowl cut.

6.  Puppy Love

Did anyone else groan aloud when that stupid grandmother, Martha, told off Russell Edgington and then had the nerve to be shocked when he snatched the puppy version of Emma out of her claws?  Where has this chick been that she would rumble with the Russ?  I knew it wouldn’t turn out well when Luna told Sam she was ready to scoop up her daughter, after fighting the “Obamas” in the buff.  And this is totally un-freaking related, but do you agree that Martha (Dale Dickey) and Tommy Lee Jones should be a couple in a movie in the near future?  The idea alone just made me swoon.

Finally, and then it’s your turn, I swear…  No partisanship here, but…  How mad would Republicans be if the masks used in this season’s doofus subplot had been of George W. Bush?  We saw that lunacy when “Game of Thrones” admitted to using a Bush mask on a stake.

Where’s all the outrage that the so-called “supe” killer had our current President’s visage slipped over their slimy grills.

But I digress: What did you think of this episode? Are things getting better/worse?  What do you think will happen to Hoyt?  Can Pam rally against that jerk taking the gorgeous Eric’s place? Do tell, in comments below.






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