“True Blood” is getting a sight better. Billith is still annoying and I’m still not buying Pam and Tara as a couple. Lafayette is clearly being cheated out of screen time. But Sookie isn’t anywhere near as grating on my nerves and there was enough ab-tastic action to make up for Sook prancing around in what appeared to be a doily ripped from Gran’s dining room table.
And there was action. Glorious, non-smoke monster related action.
So, now, with no further ado…I bring you Truesday. Five notable moments and my round-up of rudderless plot points.
1. Hair Brain
What did Alcide’s crazy girlfriend say about Nicole (Jurnee Smollett)? She called her the one with the “crazy hair?” Not sure what that crack means from a creature who is nothing but a shag rug with an attitude come the full moon. Let’s not be culturally insensitive, lil’ were-tramp. Boom, Sesame Street in your face.
2. Fairy Tale
Did I NOT say Ben was Warlow? **paces room triumphantly** I told y’all. Too bad this hybrid of a fairy and a vamp completely lost all his great scheming abilities in record time, foolishly letting a weakened Jason feed from him and then dripping his magic blood all over the floor for CSI Sookie to find. Maybe her pouty lips and stereotypical Southern accent made him forget all discretion. And speaking of discretion, let’s talk about that foooine Mr. Stackhouse all V’d up doing those pull-ups on the door frame. My Gawd. Did I just fall off my own couch? I surely did. And I will not pretend that I did not enjoy that little shaving scene between him and his sworn enemy. With that Miguel “Adorn” thrown in there? Lawd. **fans self**
3. Goodbye Grandpa!
Is the fun with actor Rutger Hauer over so soon? I doubted his character would stay long, what with his goofy scheme to team up with Jason to unleash a buckshot and Care Bear sneak attack on Warlow. Still, I was glad Warlow spared him, simply flinging him into a black hole that looked like it belonged on a made-for-Syfy movie. So there is hope he’ll return though Warlow/Ben drained him like he was a crazy straw. Poor lil’ Jason can’t keep a family member, other than Sook, safe.
4. Turn Up
Eric is being a jerk, ain’t he? First he gets Willa all hot and bothered cuddling up to her in a coffin, but rebuffs her attempt to sample his Viking blood. (Did she think she was at Costco?) Then, he turns her only to send her back to her crazy daddy with an emotional appeal to spare vampkind. Since Willa got shot within minutes of her transformation, I’m guessing she might not live to be thousands of years old like her strategic Maker. And if she does live, Pam will NOT be pleased to have this new sister. By the way, I was grossed out by that blood-drenched scene…Willa looked like Carrie and Eric (though the bawdy continues to be banging) was channeling some Twilight tween vamp with his flowery talk.
5. Sister, Sister
Jessica has snapped. The fan fave baby vamp showed she still has that wildness in her when she systematically drank er’ry single one of those adorable, unnamed daughters of Andy Bellefleur, despite initially trying to protect them. Yet it’s not all her fault. Where is their dad? Now this man knew his daughters could potentially age by several decades, he should have gone over all that material about getting into cars with blood-guzzling strangers, underage drinking and the dangers of borrowing clothes from the Wet Seal closet of Arlene Bellefleur. The young ladies looked to be dead by Jess’s fang, but since they haven’t shriveled up like their fairy counterparts, there is a sliver of hope. I think.
Throwaway Plot Points
6. Terry Cloth
I get why Andy had the fairy daughters because they were eventual bait for crazy Bill, but why are we still talking about that godawful storyline last year featuring the poor man’s smoke monster and Patrick? Enough already with this tortured cook and his nag of a wife. **waves ball of fairy power in their general direction**
7. Makeup Sex
I get the whole despair and need for human connection thing, but what in the world is Nicole doing with Sam? That whole sexual attraction seemed forced and talk about fickle. Luna has been dead, what, a week? And didn’t Nicole’s supe-supporting man just bite the dust hours ago? Both of these peeps should be made to see a grief counselor, stat.
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